I received this story a couple of days ago:
"I'm not ashamed to say that I am mobi-dicted. It's the best way to stay connected to friends and keep current on news. But what happened to me the other day borders on embarrassing so I thought I'd share it with you.
I wait tables in a busy restaurant. Naturally, it's a management rule that servers can't have phones with them during a shift so that we stay focused on our tables. I always follow this rule, but one day last week I got so involved in texting a friend before work and didn't want to stop when my shift began. So I kept my phone on me and covertly typed a quick message whenever I had a spare moment. Multitasking was a little tough, but the diners stayed happy and my managers had no idea about the texting, so I figured it was all running smoothly.
A little later, when I had a spare moment, I checked to see what my friend had just texted me. He'd written: 'What are you talking about? Turkey club, filet, side of mashed potatoes? Is this a joke I'm not getting?' I didn't understand, so I checked the message I'd just sent. Indeed, I'd accidentally texted him my most recent table's order instead of sending it back to the kitchen. I froze for a second. If I'd sent him the order, what did I put into the computer to go back to the kitchen?
I raced to the kitchen. The cooks were laughing and smiling at me. "So Jenny told Maria that she was fat?" one cook said, trying his best to keep a straight face. My managers didn't find the 'mixed message' quite as funny, but fortunately it only amounted to a slap on the wrist. It's the only time mobi-diction has crept into my job, but my coworkers won't let me forget it anytime soon."
Please, keep sending your stories in!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Tales of Mobi-Diction, pt1
The weekend is nearly upon us, which I think calls for a more relaxed, anecdotal post. A friend, who due to the sensational nature of this story will remain nameless, related this to me a few days ago:
"I just upgraded from a pretty basic phone to the new iPhone. Having used mobile devices for years with a commendable degree of sanity and moderation, I thought I could adapt to my new one without any problems. But the iPhone's just got so many features, especially GPS, that I've gotten accustomed to and have come to rely upon it more than I should. This was made clear to me the other day.
Since the iPhone has GPS, I never bother to look up the address of where I'm going before I leave the house, since I can just do it on the fly. So when I found out that my girlfriend's parents were in town for a surprise visit, I suggested we all eat dinner. It was my job to choose the restaurant, but I'd just left work and didn't have time to go home first. So I grabbed my trusty new iPhone, pulled up the GPS and looked up the address for a hip new restaurant, 'Liza,' that a buddy had told me about. I called my girlfriend, told her the address, and let her know I'd be a little behind them and that they could go ahead and grab a table.
As I approached the restaurant a few minutes later I saw my girlfriend and her parents standing outside the front door. They looked a little annoyed. I asked if there was a long wait inside, to which my girlfriend curtly replied, "There's no wait." "Well, you didn't need to wait up on me." My girlfriend looked at me in a way no one's ever looked at me, like she was choking for air. In the same curt tone, she spat out: "Why don't you go in and check it out for yourself?"
I stepped inside. Music blared. Lots of red lights and mirrors. This was not the restaurant I'd heard about. And then I connected all the dots. The stage, the pole in the center? I'd invited my girlfriend and her parents to a strip club. In utter panic and confusion, I stumbled outside again.
I was screwed either way. If I lied and told them I purposely sent them to a strip club, they wouldn't have seen the humor in it. And if I told them that I just plugged something into my iPhone they'd think I was irresponsible and uncaring. Needless to say, the only thing I've been using the Internet on the iPhone for recently has been reading articles on how to correct relationship mistakes.
It was much later that I found out I'd misheard my friend. Riza, not Liza, was the restaurant he'd recommended. Of course, if I'd never allowed myself to become so reliant on my device, I'd never have been in this situation, would I?"
That's a pretty good one. I know that you or someone you know's had a similarly funny, embarrassing, or downright frightening experience arising from your addiction to a mobile device, and I'd love to hear about them. Feel free to post below!
"I just upgraded from a pretty basic phone to the new iPhone. Having used mobile devices for years with a commendable degree of sanity and moderation, I thought I could adapt to my new one without any problems. But the iPhone's just got so many features, especially GPS, that I've gotten accustomed to and have come to rely upon it more than I should. This was made clear to me the other day.
Since the iPhone has GPS, I never bother to look up the address of where I'm going before I leave the house, since I can just do it on the fly. So when I found out that my girlfriend's parents were in town for a surprise visit, I suggested we all eat dinner. It was my job to choose the restaurant, but I'd just left work and didn't have time to go home first. So I grabbed my trusty new iPhone, pulled up the GPS and looked up the address for a hip new restaurant, 'Liza,' that a buddy had told me about. I called my girlfriend, told her the address, and let her know I'd be a little behind them and that they could go ahead and grab a table.
As I approached the restaurant a few minutes later I saw my girlfriend and her parents standing outside the front door. They looked a little annoyed. I asked if there was a long wait inside, to which my girlfriend curtly replied, "There's no wait." "Well, you didn't need to wait up on me." My girlfriend looked at me in a way no one's ever looked at me, like she was choking for air. In the same curt tone, she spat out: "Why don't you go in and check it out for yourself?"
I stepped inside. Music blared. Lots of red lights and mirrors. This was not the restaurant I'd heard about. And then I connected all the dots. The stage, the pole in the center? I'd invited my girlfriend and her parents to a strip club. In utter panic and confusion, I stumbled outside again.
I was screwed either way. If I lied and told them I purposely sent them to a strip club, they wouldn't have seen the humor in it. And if I told them that I just plugged something into my iPhone they'd think I was irresponsible and uncaring. Needless to say, the only thing I've been using the Internet on the iPhone for recently has been reading articles on how to correct relationship mistakes.
It was much later that I found out I'd misheard my friend. Riza, not Liza, was the restaurant he'd recommended. Of course, if I'd never allowed myself to become so reliant on my device, I'd never have been in this situation, would I?"
That's a pretty good one. I know that you or someone you know's had a similarly funny, embarrassing, or downright frightening experience arising from your addiction to a mobile device, and I'd love to hear about them. Feel free to post below!
Monday, October 20, 2008
The Silver Anniversary
If you're a mobile buff you've been and will continue reading this everywhere you look this month, but it's momentous enough to repeat here as well. 25 years ago this week, the world's first commercial cell phone call took place right here in Chicago. From inside a convertible at Soldier Field, Bob Barnett, then president of Ameritech Mobile, phoned the grandson of telephone inventor Alexander Graham Bell. The content of Barnett's conversation with Bell's grandson, who was in Berlin at the time, is now the stuff of legend. Many speculate that the two men hailed the achievement and spoke of all the good it could do for mankind. Other bystanders report that Barnett spoke only one sentence: 'It's cold as $!&# here, Alex.' Whatever the case, it was the start of a revolution.
So what are some ways to commemorate the Silver anniversary of the commercial cellular phone? One idea I've heard Motorola is toying with is a reissue of their original model, the DynaTAC. If this is true, they'll probably want to adjust the original's sticker price ($4000) and do something about its infamous girth.
If it were up to me, we'd see a limited-edition sterling silver iPhone to mark the occasion. Rather than wait for this highly unlikely occurrence, however, how about we simply take a minute's silence to reflect on everything our mobile devices have done for us in the last 25 years?
Now that was nice. If you're like me, your silence was interrupted (or, as we might say, blessed) at least once by the dulcet ringtone of your beloved device, and perhaps that is the ultimate testament: in 25 short years the mobile phone's gone from a clunky luxury item to something that pervades every aspect of our lives.
So what are some ways to commemorate the Silver anniversary of the commercial cellular phone? One idea I've heard Motorola is toying with is a reissue of their original model, the DynaTAC. If this is true, they'll probably want to adjust the original's sticker price ($4000) and do something about its infamous girth.
If it were up to me, we'd see a limited-edition sterling silver iPhone to mark the occasion. Rather than wait for this highly unlikely occurrence, however, how about we simply take a minute's silence to reflect on everything our mobile devices have done for us in the last 25 years?
Now that was nice. If you're like me, your silence was interrupted (or, as we might say, blessed) at least once by the dulcet ringtone of your beloved device, and perhaps that is the ultimate testament: in 25 short years the mobile phone's gone from a clunky luxury item to something that pervades every aspect of our lives.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
The Biggest Question
Some questions are so big, so probing, so crucial to our humanity that debate on them rages for centuries. The mere mention of these questions at social gatherings provokes shouting, tears, and all too often even physical violence. But within this group of big questions, there is one of such great magnitude that it stands alone at the top. The answer to this question is the very fabric of existence. That question, of course is: do mobile devices cause cancer?
The two images above are infrared. The first, on the left, is of a man who has never used a mobile device in his life. The blue, green and yellow indicate healthy tissue. The second image, on the right, is of the same man after a single five minute cell phone conversation. See all that red? Those are persistent cancer cells in his brain. He won't live past two weeks. And that's the rule, not the exception. So, basically, every single time you use your device, no matter how briefly, it's like playing a high-tech version of Russian Roulette with yourself. Mobile devices will bring about the Armageddon.
Okay.
It's not nearly that bad. The red and orange in the image above are actually just signs of thermal heating, which may well have no negative health consequences whatsoever. But there are those out there who have feelings that aren't too far off from what I just described. Then again, there are those who are equally convinced beyond doubt that devices present no health risks. Both sides have 'studies' to reference, but thus far there has not been a single, all-encompassing study to tip the scales one way or the other. The American Cancer Society has done a few studies over the last few years and determined that there is 'no consistent association between cell-phone use and overall risk of brain cancer.' But those studies only tested people who used cell phones over a three year period, so there is certainly still a possible risk of health hazards for long term users.
Perhaps the real question we ought to ask is how we came to a situation where 3 billion people use a device that may or may not kill them in a decade or so. While at this point I'm pretty skeptical of a link, the people raising the alarm bells are respected doctors, not crackpot conspiracy theorists. Shouldn't who's ever in charge of public health have looked into all of this at some point? As it stands now, we may not know we have a problem until it's too late. Sounds a lot like another worldwide crisis that's been receiving a lot of press lately...
The two images above are infrared. The first, on the left, is of a man who has never used a mobile device in his life. The blue, green and yellow indicate healthy tissue. The second image, on the right, is of the same man after a single five minute cell phone conversation. See all that red? Those are persistent cancer cells in his brain. He won't live past two weeks. And that's the rule, not the exception. So, basically, every single time you use your device, no matter how briefly, it's like playing a high-tech version of Russian Roulette with yourself. Mobile devices will bring about the Armageddon.Okay.
It's not nearly that bad. The red and orange in the image above are actually just signs of thermal heating, which may well have no negative health consequences whatsoever. But there are those out there who have feelings that aren't too far off from what I just described. Then again, there are those who are equally convinced beyond doubt that devices present no health risks. Both sides have 'studies' to reference, but thus far there has not been a single, all-encompassing study to tip the scales one way or the other. The American Cancer Society has done a few studies over the last few years and determined that there is 'no consistent association between cell-phone use and overall risk of brain cancer.' But those studies only tested people who used cell phones over a three year period, so there is certainly still a possible risk of health hazards for long term users.
Perhaps the real question we ought to ask is how we came to a situation where 3 billion people use a device that may or may not kill them in a decade or so. While at this point I'm pretty skeptical of a link, the people raising the alarm bells are respected doctors, not crackpot conspiracy theorists. Shouldn't who's ever in charge of public health have looked into all of this at some point? As it stands now, we may not know we have a problem until it's too late. Sounds a lot like another worldwide crisis that's been receiving a lot of press lately...
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